That unconditional and pure love connecting children with their parents is one of the deepest and most noble human feelings at all. Thus, since the dutifulness to parents in Islam is a kind of worship, disobedience otherwise is a major sin, because no matter how obedience and loyalty that children would show to their parents, they can not reward the parents' kindness, care, and love they deserve.
On the status of parents in Islam, Dr. Omar bin Abdulaziz Al-Saeed, associate professor at the Faculty of Sharia and Islamic Studies in Al-Ahsa, Saudi Arabia, stressed that Islam urged to obey and respect parents. Which is confirmed and stressed by many verses in Quran and Prophet's Hadiths.
On the other hand, when we look at human behavior, we see people usually respect the good person and automatically attribute credit to his parents who raised him on morality and true religion. And vice versa, a person who misbehaves will bring trouble to his family, because people look at him with contempt and see that his parents have failed to raise him properly.
Here is a question: how to be righteous with our parents?
In this regard, Muslim scholars have classified righteousness into two phases: honoring parents during their lifetime, and then after their death.
With regard to honoring parents in their lifetime, first, adult children should support their parents financially if they do not have enough for living expenses. This is obligatory in Islam, furthermore, it brings blessings onto person's life, his money, his health and his children as well. Even if parents have a high standard of living and do not need any kind of financial support, there is another aspect should not be overlooked; giving gifts to parents on various personal and religious occasions, as it has a great psychological impact on parents, because it makes them feel loved and appreciated. However, there are those who leave their parents living on the aid of charities, although they have a lot of money.
The second is to obey the parents and meet all their needs, especially in time of illness or old age. Which makes parents feel reassured.
Thirdly, siblings should maintain in good relation with each other, and avoid quarrels and disputes, because when parents see their children care for each other, they will feel satisfied and reassured.
Fourthly, warm welcome and joy when parents visit their married children's homes, because this would please the parents, and on the other hand, this would teach grandchildren practically how to respect parents and be gratitude to them.
As for honoring deceased parents, this can be done by Al Duaa and praying to Allah Almighty to grant them forgiveness. Besides maintaining good ties with the extended family and with the parents' friends as well. Moreover, arranging an everlasting charity in favor of the deceased parents is considered the best gift for them. The choices in this area are numerous and varied, for example: funding a Quranic school, sponsoring a student, drilling a well in a remote area, entering into a shared charitable project, etc. Above all, we should know quite well that no matter how much of love, care and reverence we give to our parents, it will never be equal to the joy and blessings that they spread in our homes throughout their lives.